conscious all...

i am just a baby,
re-born of the conscious all;
do i take this step right here...
might i only fall?
there is no step;no one to take;
and NO...there is no fall...
welcome to the conscious world...
where nothing is and not...your call.
stay re-born...Be what Is...
You are just the flow...
cannot choose...no one to choose...
which way or how flow goes...
be that what you are right now!
let go of egos imagined wall!
i am pure awareness...
never born of conscious all...

tlc...

truth is truth...

truth is truth; not nice; not pretty;
sometimes harsh; sometimes silly;
sometimes truth masquerades as me...
all comes out as suppose to be.
sometimes as me, it thinks it knows;
and on and on and on truth goes...
truth slaps beliefs...square in the face;
until truth's left without a trace...
fairy tales and romance dies...
never was born...be gone with lies!
truth is truth; tis beautiful and free...
truth is the root of every tree...
happiness is truth...joy is too...
the truth is truth is me and you.
i am and am not;
know nothing of myself...
the absolute is all there is...
can't be anything else...

tlc...

trapped...

have recently been forced to look at the way my thinking traps me...

the problem centers in the mind...

when i am in my head, i am trapped. going round and round...entertaining thoughts...thinking trying to figure out why i am thinking...what i am thinking...and why the thinking wont stop!

this is my definition of insanity today...

my thinking traps me...until i take the energy that i am using to try and stop my thinking...and use it to do what is in front of me to do...i stay trapped...

action...action...and more action...

am convinced that the energy taken from thinking to doing...is the courage to change...

starlightjustfortoday...

Happy Holidays...

making it through holidays in sobriety can be very difficult for alcoholic/addicts;

i mean, truth be told, when i was using, never had to have a holiday...

the sun was shining...i used...

the sun wasn't shining...i used...

i have had a wonderful weekend...went to several barbeques and one picnic...and swimming too...

i have been blessed by having the desire to use removed...not that i have not thought about it...however; today...if i even start to romanticize about using again...which is normal in a way...every alcoholic fantasizes about being a normal drinker......AS IF! and that is how the obsession begins...in the mind..."oh i can just have one drink"...NOT!

when i think about it...and am honest, i never wanted to be a normal drinker...NO WAY...have one drink and that's it? WHY? never did understand those so-called "normal drinkers"...however, when it does enter my mind...which would be normal for me, i only have to play the tape all the way through...if i am being honest with myself, then there is no way that i can take a drink or a drug today.

one drink or drug...is one to many...and a thousand is never enough...

that is the truth of the matter...and when i am honest with myself about that...my holidays could not be any happier...

starlightjustfortoday...

when the dust settles...

when the dust of the mind settles itself down,
wonders and mysteries are there to be found;
mountains spring forth, where nothing once was,
consciousness is infinite oceans of love.
no more of the old...everything is new,
playing in illusion...playing being you...
what fun it is now...to know what is known...
to really understand...the rollar coaster you're on...
happiness and joy...ALWAYS IS NOW...
no need to explain, the why or the how...
peace knows no time...space holds no love...
all becomes one...below and above...
the one has no form...potential for change?
only your unknowing seems to rearrange...
mystery unraveling before all eyes...
always has been there...it never dies...
no seeking, no searching, not even desire...
something unseen...just propels you higher...
what is it...what was that...what, what can it be...?
the I that I always was...without the me...

tlc...