today or tomorrow...

tomorrow never gets here...when it does, it is always today...i will live today, tomorrow, instead of trying to live tomorrow, today...

it is so easy to get ahead of myself, and forget that it is God's grace that has given me everything...including the air that i breath. when things start falling into place, there is a tendency to think "i am cured". i will never be cured from this disease...i can recover...i am recovering...but it is a simple program that requires me to live just for today...i am not promised tomorrow, and God is not in tomorrow...God is right here right now. i cannot make promises to others, that i use to make and fall short of...i cannot say: "i will never use again!" cannot count the times that i said that, and meant it, only to find myself lost again in the depths of addiction. this is a scary time for me, but also, a time for adventure. the problem is in fearing the unknown...i cannot live in tomorrow...it is all in my head and full of fear. this is a program of action...not thinking to act...and i can only live in this day...right now...if i have truely turned my will and my life over to the care of God...then what ever happens today, is God's will. so, i cannot live tomorrow today, but i can use what worked today...again...

keeping it real...star.